JUST BOUGHT MY GRIMES TICKETS!!!
“Hey, if you are gonna be home soonish could you let me know? Because I am pretty stoned, kinda drunk and will be semi to fully naked. K, thanks, love you, bye.”
I have to work at 9, but shit if I care. I am only young once.
Also, I have the biggest crush on Tig Notaro.
someone take my phone away from me please.
I am dead.
and after 5 years of working hungover at the cafe, I finally puked.
oh and I begged my coworker to close for me and now I seriously owe him so many baked goods.
ughhhh, bad life decisions.
forever ongoing pattern…
someone please take my phone away from me and delete all the contacts of anyone who has a schlong.
Whiskey will never be the same!!!
DRUNK AND SENTIMENTAL
and they be creepin’ HARD.
that accent doesn’t fool me brah!
I might break my previous record and wear 3 pairs of tights tonight…
Should make for an interesting time when I inevitably have to pee in a dark alley at some point tonight.
please keep me in your prayers…
3 bottles of wine down. Watching Billy Eichner videos. And having the time of my life. Who needs friends???
what my wet dreams are made of…
(sorry i’m drunk)
you can only laugh…